01.31.09
Posted in Friends, School at 4:14 pm by jaqi
dear jaqi, im about to explode!!!!
Im trying to focus on school and there are too many things in the way. If my friends would stop bugging me with their problems then i would do better in school. HELP AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!!!
Dear Christine,
You should tell your friends that you can’t help them all the time. You could also try scheduling some time every day to turn off your phone and computer while you study and do your homework. Once they realize that you’re not their therapist, you’ll have more time for school work. Make sure they know that you care but you just can’t help them when you have other things that have to be done.
I hope everything works out for you.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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01.30.09
Posted in Dating at 4:39 pm by jaqi
hey how r u?….. I have this new bf but we dont really talk much. wen i c him i have to come up to him and say sumthing i havent broken up wit him bcuz i dont know if he is just shy or he wants to act lik he doent have a girlfriend. but i havent said n e thing eihter becuz im really shy. How do I talk to him about us?
That’s a difficult situation to be in. It’s confusing when you repeatedly have no success in trying to find out what a guy is thinking. Sometimes it’s easy, sometimes it’s difficult.
Maybe you should try asking him why he’s acting the way he is. He may be shy; it could be that he has trouble talking to girls. If it turns out he’s shy you could try telling him that you are too. It might make him feel better about talking to you.
Good luck with your boyfriend. 
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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01.27.09
Posted in Dating, Parents at 8:57 pm by jaqi
Heyy,
I’m 14 going on 15 in August. I’m currently dating someone who is 18 going on 19 in April. I really don’t see anything wrong with it but I know its illegal and my mom thinks me and him are close friends. I constantly talk to him on the phone and everything, she doesn’t mind.
I was just wondering, is it really wrong to be with him since hes 4 years older? I mean I know his little sister and some of his family, we’re not having sex at all or anything.
Most teens date kids their age because they’ll have more in common with each other. There’s nothing wrong with dating an older guy, but you really should tell your mom about him if your gonna keep dating him. It really isn’t right to keep it from her.
One thing to think about is how much the age difference will effect the relationship. He’ll be going off to college soon and you’ll still be in high school. That’ll make it really difficult to keep dating. If you dated someone closer to your age, you would see them more often.
I hope everything works out.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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01.25.09
Posted in School at 6:14 pm by jaqi
hey jaqi,
my whole life is messing up. i had a fight at skool and ended up almost getting expelled. everybody teases me and calls me emo and now my boyfriend is joining in with the teasing. i have told him that it hurts my feelings but he says that everything is a joke and he will do it the next day. i feel scared to go to skool coz i knocked this chick out at skool and now she’s getting all her friends to beat me up the next time i see her. so i try to lay low at skool and run as fast as i can to classes. i need help i really want to punch her again but i know i’ll get in trouble again and maybe get expelled and i dont want to get expelled coz my friends are at my skool and i dont want to start again in another skool. please help me I NEED ADVICE!!!!
please help
luv peggy
Hey Peggy,
First, lets talk about the boyfriend. If he’s bugging you about it and won’t stop (even after you’ve talked to him about the fact that it hurts and annoys you!) then you might need to dump him. If he really doesn’t care about how he is making you feel, then he’s not good enough to be your boyfriend.
Second, if this girl is bothering you and threatening to beat you up then you really need to get help. I know it may sound lame but you should ask an adult for help. If you can’t feel safe at school, you can’t concentrate and get decent grades, which will affect your future.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
PS Don’t hit her again or get in any more fights; it’ll only make things worse.
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01.24.09
Posted in Self Image at 3:11 pm by jaqi
When i was eight years old my parents divorced. I used to be willing to do anything and talk to anyone i didn’t know without being nervous. after the divorce I switched to many different schools and got really shy.
The thing that is my problem is that I’m shy around boys. I have to get to know them a lot to open up more and I think i might have ruined it for myself a couple of times. I don’t know how to joke around with them without thinking that they may feel weird about it so sometimes i don’t even say anything until one of my girl-friends is there and im just too reserved now. I don’t like it. I want my old self back.
How do I open up even more without feeling scared?
Distressed,
You’re already on the right track by knowing what you want to change about yourself and why you feel the way you do. Understanding yourself is a big step!
My parents also divorced when I was around that age. It messed me up for a looonng time. One good thing that I used to do all the time when I was switching schools so often was to hang out with people a lot like me. If you have more in common with someone then it is soooo much easier to talk to them. Usually when you feel comfortable around a group of people, that boosts your confidence a lot.
Here’s something else that might help you a bit. Think of someone you admire, like your mother or your favorite character in a movie or book. Pick someone confident and fun, since those are the characteristics you are hoping to gain. Try to emulate this person. That usually helps you become more like who you want to be - used to be - because it is kind of like acting instead of trying to change yourself. The more you do it though, the more natural it becomes!
Good luck with the guys. I hope my advice helps.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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01.21.09
Posted in Dating at 10:02 pm by jaqi
me and my ex boyfriend have been on and off for two months. after every time we brokeup he said its really over. the last time we dated was our best time, we were so happy. he told me he loved me all the time, and we hungout a lot and talked on the phone. then he just broke up with me out of no where. i tried to talk to him but he says he hates me and were done for good. even his bestfriend tried talking to him for me. im in love with him and i dont know what to say or do. all i know is i neeeed him back. please please help me.
Briana,
Something you should always be sure of is that your boyfriend reeeeaaally cares about you. He shouldn’t call you names or hurt your feelings. If you have a boyfriend that does these things then he’s not worth it.
I hate to say this but if he’s saying he hates you then maybe you should try moving on. If he’s the type of guy to say something like that (no matter how mad he is) then you should probably just forget about him. Same thing with the random break up. If he didn’t bother to tell you why he broke up with you - or broke up with you for absolutely no reason - then, like I said before, try to move on.
I know it sounds hard, and sometimes it can be, but when you finally find the right guy, you’ll be happy you did.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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01.18.09
Posted in Dating at 9:35 pm by jaqi
Dear Jaqi,
There’s this boy that i like but i’ve never talked to him. We’re in this group thing where we see each other every week. On new years we were leaving out of the door and my mom gave him a hug. So then she told me to give him a hug. But i think he likes me what should i do. How can i talk to him?
Can you talk to each other during this group thing? Is that the only time you see him? If you can talk to him there, or somewhere else that you see him, try talking to him about something you both have in common. If you don’t know whats similar about you two, then find out. Ask him what he likes to do in his spare time or something. If you can’t talk to him there, you’ll have to find a way to see him somewhere you CAN talk. I’m not really sure how to help you with that, but if you want to you can go back to the email form and email me again with more info!
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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01.17.09
Posted in Dating at 1:04 pm by jaqi
Dear jaqi
I don’t kno what to do I kno this guy since we were 9 yearsz old he is like part of my family since we were kids we always had a crush on each other 3 weeks ago he called my dad asking him if he could take me out to the movies and surprisingly my dad said yes now every time I’m with him I get so nervous so when he talks to him I always come out with a attitude and its becoming a habit and I don’t want to loose him I love him so much
What do I do??
Dear Angie,
You already know he likes you, so you have nothing to be nervous about! Just try your best to be yourself. Maybe you should try talking to him about it. Just tell him you know that you’ve been acting kinda strange sometimes lately and you said some things you don’t mean. If you tell him that the attitude is unintentional, then that should help some.
When you’re about to say something mean just catch yourself and don’t say anything for a bit. Remember how much you like him and that you have nothing to be nervous about. Think about what you really WANT to say before you say anything.
Don’t forget, you have known each other a long time and he knows you and has had a crush on you all these years! Don’t be nervous. Enjoy it!
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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01.06.09
Posted in Dating at 11:38 pm by jaqi
Hi, i knw this may sound crazy but i met this guy online playing a game… i have knwn him for a few years nw and im falling for him more and more every day… it seems like i could never get over him although im only turning 13 this yr i think i myt be in love or just a silly crush! he has never asked me to do anything or forced me and i was wondering if u thought it was possible to fall in love with someone online? (he is 4 years older)
Danielle,
Falling in love at 13 is unlikely especially with someone you only know online. At your age it’s important to interact with teens your age. Go out and meet a guy in person, like at your school or something, or church. Another thing… make sure he’s your age, or really close.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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Posted in Dating at 3:54 pm by jaqi
Hey jaqi
Im dating this guy n i like him a lot. When we first started going out we talked all the time, but now we don’t really talk. He doesn’t call me any more, he puts me on hold for other girls. I am thinking about breaking up with him but im not really sure what i should do. What should i do??
Brittany,
When boyfriends stop caring as much as they used to I usually talk to them. In the end if the conversation doesn’t really turn out too great then I would break up with them. Try giving this guy a chance to explain, it’s possible that it could be something ridiculous and talking could fix it. If he doesn’t want to take the time to talk then break up with him.
If you stay with him then he needs to treat you right, no more putting you on hold for other girls. If he doesn’t do it break up with him.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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