Advice for Teenagers from a Teen’s Perspective
Jaqi won’t be accepting any new requests for advice through the website in the near future. Being a typical American teenager, she has a lot going on in her life and, right now, she needs a break from the advice column.
Don’t worry… if you’ve sent in a question to Jaqi that hasn’t been answered yet, it will be. Stay tuned. (She’s just not taking new questions for now.)
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dear jaqi,
i have a problem. you see there’s this guy at school that i like, his name is justin and he’s really cute and nice. but im too shy to talk to him. i tried messaging him online, but he doesn’t talk to people he doesn’t know. i get really nervous whenever he’s around, and the worse thing is, he’s friends with one of my old friends. it’s just a complicated situation. how do i get the courage to talk to him?
Dear Leah,
Sometimes it can be difficult to talk to guys. I can relate to that. It’s always harder to talk to the ones you really like because your worried you’ll say something stupid and that they won’t like you. The truth is that it’s best to just be yourself around boys because the only ones who are really worth liking are the ones that like the real you and don’t care if you say something strange because they like you for who you are. It’s very true that it’s hard to find guys like this, but it’s sooo worth it in the end. Trust me.
Try your best at talking to him. Just say hi and tell him who you are. If you work up some confidence to talk to him and get to know him a little, then maybe you could try talking to him online again.
I don’t quite understand how the old friend fits in to the situation completely, but it seems like this is discouraging you a little. Try to catch your guy when this old friend of yours isn’t with him.
Just remember to be yourself. Good luck with everything.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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I have a crush on this cute guy at my school (jc). the problem is thay my best friend had just started dating him. But, i don’t think that if he knew i liked him, he would have asked her out. He broke up with her a couple months ago and we have been talking a lot lately. i don’t want to hurt my friend but i don’t want to lose my chance with this boy. What should i do?
Try talking to your friend about it. Maybe you could tell her you’ve liked him for a long time and now that he’s single again you’d like to see if he likes you to0. Ask her how she feels about it and if she’s ok with the idea of you and him dating one day.
If your friend isn’t comfortable with the idea then don’t try to date him. Friends are far more important than boys at your age. Lots of people make the mistake of leaning towards the boys. A guy is usually temporary, good friends are forever.
Good luck.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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dear jaqi,
im having friend problems. theres this girl i met a while ago. i thought we were best friends. She told me that all the time!i felt that way for her too and cared a great deal. but i recently just realized that, all of that was just a lie. i am not her best friend anymore and she hurt me so much when i found out. ive never felt so hurt before, i wish she would realize that. it made me cry like all day. i dont feel like i need to be her friend anymore. should i let her go? should i tell her how i feel? what can i do to make me her best friend again?? please help me
Dear Chloe,
If she was faking being your best friend then you definitely shouldn’t try to be friends with her. A girl who’s willing to hurt someone like that wouldn’t ever be a truly good friend to anyone. I know I would definitely want to know why she did it if I were in your shoes, so maybe you should ask her what happened, why she did it.
I think you should make some new friends and try to forget about this girl. I’m really sorry about what happened.
I hope everything works out.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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dear jaqi, im about to explode!!!!
Im trying to focus on school and there are too many things in the way. If my friends would stop bugging me with their problems then i would do better in school. HELP AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!!!
Dear Christine,
You should tell your friends that you can’t help them all the time. You could also try scheduling some time every day to turn off your phone and computer while you study and do your homework. Once they realize that you’re not their therapist, you’ll have more time for school work. Make sure they know that you care but you just can’t help them when you have other things that have to be done.
I hope everything works out for you.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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dear jaqi,
i need friend advice! i met this girl 4 months ago and she is actually like my best friend and i want her to feel the same way about
me.. i get really jealous when i here about what her and her best friends do and i wish i could be included.. and i wish she would stop ditching me at work.. shes a really good person and i would never hurt her but i don’t want to feel this way anymore and sometimes i don’t even want to be her friend but i still love her and she always tells me that she loves me and that i mean a lot to her but im so confused!!
what should i do! please help me!!
Dear Emma,
Ok, so you want to be included more in your new friend’s life, right? Try asking her over to your house or hang out at the mall together. Do something with her that she enjoys. Talk it out if ya want. If everything works out then yaayyy, good for you. If it doesn’t, move on, make some more friends.
Everyone has more than one best friend so spend time with some more people (and understand when she does too).
I once had a friend who didn’t always include me in things she and her other friends did, so I invited her over to my house. We got to know each other better and we ended up as better friends.
I really hope everything works out for you.
Hs&Ks,
Jaqi
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Hello Jaqi (:
Well, I was going out with this guy for like a year. He broke up with me after his homeless dad shot me in the foot, and I was like what the heck? So then he dated my friend Kelsey, and she was all like “well, I hope we can still be friends.” Then I went around telling people I was going to kill her, like, literally. So then she like blocked me on myspace out of nowhere, and then they broke up because she was heavily on drugs. Later she sends me a myspace friend request and said, “my mom blocked you cause she didn’t want you to mess up things between me and Philip. I hope we can be friends again.”
And I do wanna be her friend again…
but idk.
My other problem is the fact that I may be too intimidating. I mean, I do dress out. I figured my personality made up for the fact that I look scary.
What should I do?
Rabekah
Anderson, Indiana
I think you should try and give this girl a chance. Find a day to go hang out with her. Go get lunch together over the weekend and catch up. If it works out then I think you should definitely try and be friends with her again.
Your other problem isn’t as bad as it might seem. Being unique is very important. Most kids don’t understand that everyone is eventually gonna change and have their own ideas and experiences. I’ve always valued my individuality. I’ve learned that some people are bothered by it and some people will also admire you for it.
Good luck with your friend and never lose your extraordinary personality.
Jaqi
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